From Whiff Waff to Tim Tams "Piffle" Johnson has no substance.

Alexander Boris de Pfeffel  (piffle) Johnson has worked on a persona  almost of talking piffle to hide the fact that he has no subsidence. during his speech his speech at a party to mark the handover of the Olympic flag at the end of the 2008 Beijing Olympics. He declaimed, “Ping-pong was invented on the dining tables of England, ladies and gentlemen, in the 19th century. [CHEERS] It was, and it was called whiff-whaff.” Experts jumped on him at the time, telling him he’d got his facts wrong. Chuck Hoey, Curator of the International Table Tennis Federation’s Museum in Lausanne, wrote a heavily illustrated article setting out all the facts, which he entitled Boris Johnson and the Whiff-Waff Gaffe.

But Johnson got what he wanted headlines and a reputation of eccentric remarks , which some how hid the fact that he was actually useless at his job.
Yestersay  hailed cheaper Australian chocolate biscuits as a benefit of a post-Brexit trade deal.

The PM joked about the prospects for 'reasonably priced' Tim Tams as the UK published its negotiating objectives.  

The Government hopes trade agreements with Australia and New Zealand will aid the coronavirus recovery by opening up new markets for businesses and creating jobs.

The negotiations are taking place at the same time as fraught discussions with the EU over a new relationship. 

In a video posted on Twitter 'inaugurating' the talks with Australia, Mr Johnson said: 'There is a huge amount we can do, whether it is on financial services or across all the sectors of our free trade agreement.

He said he wanted the countries to exchange Vegemite and Marmite, and noted that British-made boomerangs are already being exported there.  

Let's get this free trade agreement done, Australia and the UK coming closer together than ever before.'

Mr Johnson also joked about wanting to be able to trade McVitie's Penguin chocolate biscuits in exchange for Australian Tim Tams, a similar style of confectionery that is popular Down Under, as part of any fresh bilateral terms.

'Think of the potential which we have,' he said. 'I want a world in which we send you Marmite, you send us Vegemite.

'We send you Penguins and you send us, with reduced tariffs, these wonderful Arnott's Tim Tams.

From a Island that once led the World in exporting, we have gone from Iron and Steel to biscuits  in a sort of quid per quo for another type of biscuits.

'How long can the British people be deprived of the opportunity to have Arnott's Tim Tams at a reasonable price?'

Johnson of course his desperate that his "Oven Ready Brexit"  has  a Trade Deal any Trade Deal  established before we finally leave the EU  and has reportedly dropped his onetime pledge that the UK won't accept chlorinated chicken while trading with the US and people are not happy.

Johnson's spokesperson refused to deny a Telegraph report that he was giving in to Trump's demand that the UK accept food produced to the US's lower welfare standards. The prime minister would also not repeat the pledge to journalists.

Because the UK is leaving the EU, it will no longer be subject to bans on potentially harmful food processes, like washing chicken in chlorine and selling hormone-fed beef.

But the EU and, it turns out, a lot of other people wanted the UK to retain these rules post-Brexit, even when trading with countries like the US where chlorinated chicken is commonplace.

In 2017, then-environment secretary Michael Gove said on the BBC's Today programme that the UK wouldn't accept chlorinated chicken.

We are not going to dilute our high animal welfare standards, or our high environmental standards, in pursuit of any trade deal.

His successor Theresa Villiers reiterated the pledge in January 2020, saying:

We will not be importing chlorinated-chicken. We will not be importing hormone-treated beef.

But after US government officials made it clear that accepting their food standards was crucial to securing a trade deal, the government began to U-turn.

Don't expect Piffle Johnson holding up a chlorinated   US  frozen chicken at a goverment pres conference and joking about hormone reared cattle.

How long can he keep up this Jovial Buffoon , persona before the public realise that he is a lazy, inept and uncaring Tory leader who shouldn't even be the leader of an English Parish Council let alone running a nation.